The mind has a powerful way of attracting things that are in harmony with it, good and bad.
Ahh… attraction. The appeal, the allure, the desirability. Those who look great have a way of capturing one’s attention and imagination. But what if our heart’s desire is ill-natured, mean-spirited, or temperamental? First, I don’t find anyone inconsiderate, insensitive, and moody, attractive. But there are those who are okay with an attractive person sporting an unattractive side. You’d think the one captivated or someone in their inner circle would, within time, see through the persona. Although, that isn’t always the case. Sometimes we get bamboozled, duped, or mislead. You can guess where I’m going with this. Are you attracting the unattractive?
I must add, not everyone is fooled. There are those who can pick up on the indifference, and the level of attraction will not be as forthcoming. These are the lucky ones, the ones who skirted around and took an intentional detour. I don’t care how great someone looks. If they don’t carry a cheerful demeanor, a pleasant personality, a dash of humor, a dusting of humility, and a good measure of empathy, it will not work. But that’s just me. Everyone is different. One person’s level of tolerance will differ from another’s. With that said, I’m curious. What happens if you base everything on looks alone? Surely, in due time, you’d catch on? Well, not always.
ATTRACTING THE UNATTRACTIVE
There are some of us out there on the dating scene, hooked on appearance. “Ooh, he’s so fine.” “Ooh, she’s a vision.” The apple of their eye can do no wrong. There are also those who connect with anyone alluring for the sake of being connected – and this is a problem. I digress. There are several books taking up valuable real estate on a shelf. The books I judged solely by their covers. Even though they have attractive jackets and look compelling, I just can’t seem to get past the first chapter, let alone the first few pages.
CHOOSING WRONG
Some people choose attractive-unattractive people (this is a thing, unbelievable… I know). This is where people get bedazzled by someone’s beauty or handsomeness, only to forget themselves altogether. Now entangled in a hot mess… and there you have it, dysfunctional unions that can spell disaster. Hurt people, hurting people. And dare I say, broken people, attracting damaged people. Lotta stuff like this out there in circulation. Not a pretty sight.
CHANGING YOU CHANGING ME
What’s the point of changing who you are in order to impress her, when your intention is to return to who you were, a person she was never attracted to in the first place?
When we show up as anyone but ourselves, this is when we have a tendency of attracting the unattractive. I believe who you are matters and who you attract will matter. It should be of importance to anyone who knows and loves you. I’m not just saying this to increase the word count. It should matter to your family, to your friends, and last but not least, it should without a doubt be of consequence to you.
When you come from a sound place, there’s a less likely chance of being remotely interested in anyone who flies under the radar. Those attractive-unattractive transitory people are, in most cases, those who fall well below our standards (if we have any). But what if you have set standards and downgrade that list of yours, based on someone’s sex appeal? Well, it won’t fare well for you and it won’t turn out well for the budding romance. The connection will be a farce as it’s with someone who’s as confused, if not more so. I know! Scary, right? When we come from a state of insecurity, instability, or from an unhealthy emotional space, we will be more inclined to attract the unattractive.