Is it Time to Question a Relationship? Avoiding Dodgy Dodgers

Okay, I admit, I’m no relationship expert. With that said, I gravitate toward writing on the subject. Which leads to why I wrote this post. It’s in response to an avid reader of this blog who posed this question: “If someone isn’t on the same page, how will I know?” This is but my two cents. You’ll know. Still unsure? I have to ask… do actions speak louder than words? Of course they do. People always show us who they are. The problem is we tend to not believe everything we see, hear, feel. That said, you have options to either continue playing the game or get on with life so you can attract better. So this brings me to ask: Is it time to question a relationship? 

Things rarely change when someone’s out of sync with you right from the get go. No matter what you do, it’s important to know if they have what it takes. In other words, do they deserve you? Are they sporting a decent character? Can they hold polite yet stimulating conversations? Have you experienced good humored chitchats? Do they have a sense of humor? Or is it all hands on with little to no words? This can get tiring after a while… just putting it out there. 

IS IT TIME TO QUESTION A RELATIONSHIP?

Are they interested in you, or in what you intentionally or unintentionally deliver? Do they discuss where the two of you are going – if anywhere? Are they open to letting you all in, or are they acting as if they’re in some witness protection program? What are they hiding? Do you know? Care to know? Can you introduce them to your friends and family? Have you met theirs? If not, why not? Knowing the answers to these questions will help you decipher between what’s good and what isn’t.

QUESTIONS NEED ANSWERS

Perhaps they’re the overt serious type. Are they ultra sensitive? Just a word of caution… this can get super old after but a short time. Do they have emotional intelligence? Are they courteous and compassionate? Mature? Last but not least, will they stand the test of time? When you’re on top of your game, you’ll pick up on what works and what doesn’t. Now, I may be old school, but these are mighty fine questions, if I must say so myself.

BEYOND FIRST GLANCE 

There’s an adage: Just one look, that’s all it took (hopefully not). Here’s to recognizing all the important cues, clues, and vibes, providing all the answers, and then some. But this can take a minute. Just give it a little space and it will become quite apparent. Now, what if it doesn’t and there seemingly exists shadiness hiding behind some smoke screen? It’s important to pay attention. Make notes if you must – a journal works well. There’s also such a thing as tapping into one’s inquisitive nature. Don’t be shy, boldly question away. There’s nothing wrong with being direct, asking the right questions, especially if you’ve dated for a few months. After all, you need to know.

DODGY DODGERS DODGE QUESTIONS

You, my friend, have nothing to lose. However, just a word of caution. There’s a big red flag waving frantically whenever someone avoids answering questions. If they don’t side-step them altogether, they will question the motives behind the questions you’ve asked. If that is the case, it’s a sign to move on and keep it moving. You need but only one sign telling you… “Whatever this is – it’s going nowhere fast.”